Sometimes I stray away from photography. This is one of those days. Okay, I am going to admit my dirty little secret.  Ready?  I am a dark chocolate addict.  Totally.  It's my crack. Here's how my evenings usually roll.

My husband Kevin, well he goes by KD - short for kitchen dawg - is the banquet chef at The Windsor Court Hotel in New Orleans - yup, most likely he is making your reception dinner.  He leaves for work before the crack of dawn so by 7 o'clock in the evening he heads to bed.  Me?  I'm in repose wearing my men's baggy PJ bottoms and cami, stretched across the couch.  A couple of pillows supporting my head (can't watch TV if your head isn't upright), my iPhone plugged into the charger and resting on the arm of the couch within reach, yeah I'm addicted.  Wow I'm starting to see a pattern here...  Remote controls (4 of them) within arms reach and glimmering in the waning daylight a bag of dark chocolate something.  A siren's song if you wish echoes in my head, "dark chocolate good, yum".  I have my special blankets, one for summer, one for winter.  Oh yeah forgot to tell you.  Although we have excellent central air conditioning we also have a new two room window air conditioning unit in the living room.  Why you ask?  I'll tell you.  I claim it is really only for Miss Sybil because her Alaskan coat is very heavy and thick.  But it's for both of us. That damn TV puts out some serious heat.

Okay back to the story.  I stuff a thick pillow under my knees and wrap up in the blanket, but only after everything is set.  Ya know, the remotes, phone, tv and DAAAARK CHOCOLATE.  Once I'm settled, I turn on the television, fire-up Netflix, grab a handful of chocolate delight, check Facebook on my phone and settle in.  Well usually I settle in but I forget something and have to get up and do it all over again.  Yes, all the while Sybil is looking at me and audibly sighs.  

So now I am settled for real.  From past experiences I have learned proper and improper handling of chocolate. Like, remember those Mystic Mint cookies?  Ya know, the ones that are really Oreos, with mint flavor Crisco filling and dipped in chocolate.  In my single days I used to wake up almost every morning with at least one stuck to my belly or side.  Living briefly in a trendy area of Los Angeles I had been known to be seen asleep with a soup spoon full of peanut butter in my mouth.  Yeah I know - disgusting. But luckily, well before digital cameras and Facebook.  Whew.  No evidence.  Well, I've grown up.  No stinking peanut butter and certainly no regular milk chocolate.  I've moved up to the harder stuff.  AND I figured out how to eat on the couch in repose as well as in the bed (don't ask KD about me eating in bed...please).  M&M's.  If you grab a handful and hold them (longer in the winter cause they aren't as soft) the inside gets all melty while the hard candy shell lightly sloughs off in your hand.  I eat one at a time gently pressing on the hard candy shell with my tongue to release the melted chocolately heaven.

Every once in awhile I forget my pattern, my rules, my years of chocolate experimentation.  Or I just run out. See, here is where the addiction comes in. There is ALWAYS some form of dark chocolate in our house.  My backup is a giant bar of Hershey's Special Dark that I break up into chunks in my dark chocolate, cherry brownies made without oil.  Yeah baby.  Age has her benefits.  We learn how to work around our addictions.  So on nights when we are out of M&Ms cause I was too lazy to go to the store I reach for the big bar and break off a chunk.  A BIG CHUNK.  Now again I'm all stretched out on the couch, wrapped in a blanket with the pillow under my knees, Sybil at my side whining to go to bed, television blaring nonsense with a giant hunk of chocolate in my left hand. Do you see where this is going?

A little background.  I have really long dark brown hair.  You know where this is going don't you?  Yup.  The backup chunk has started to soften and melt in my fingers.  The inane whatever on the television has lulled my eyes closed, my breathing gets shallow and...wait for it...wait for it...I doze.  

Well a couple weeks ago I woke on the couch probably around midnight.  Headed to the bathroom on my way to bed and noticed chocolate on my hands and head.  Well shit.  I rinsed it off and shuffled to bed.  Next morning I awake, head to the bathroom, glance at the mirror and shake my head in disgust and shame.  It has now come to my attention that there is a HUGE amount of chocolate wads stuck in my hair.  Well dammit.  Now I have to hop in the shower because, well, it's just gross.  And what a waste.  

I did not consider trying to save the wad of chocolate.  In full disclosure...my landlord sends me 5# every Christmas.  Hey Dina! Send me some M&Ms!!